Twenty Nine and One-Half

Last week was my half birthday. Twenty nine and one-half. Six months until I hit the big three-zero. I'm somewhat terrified.

Mostly I am terrified of the fact that I am going to be in the exact same place that I am today when I turn thirty. And I must confess that I am not in a place that I am entirely happy with today. And, some days, I am not even a little bit happy with where I'm at.

Don't get me wrong. I love my children. They are healthy, beautiful, smart, happy, and everything I'm pretty sure I don't deserve. I love my husband. He puts up with my crazy self and thinks I am just as beautiful today as I was when we met 8 years (and 50 pounds (*gasp* I can't believe I just said that)) ago. We own a beautiful home. I drive a fancy car. I have a career that I enjoy.

But sometimes I feel like I have no clue who I am. Or who I want to be. Like I'm just going through the motions trying to make it to tomorrow. I'm fully aware that my thinking is irrational (see previous paragraph outlining all the reasons I shouldn't feel this way.)

I can't specifically pinpoint why I feel the way I do. But I'm thinking it has to do with expectations. Expectations that I put on myself. Expectations from others. Expectations that I let social media impose upon me. I expect myself to be perfect. To be happy. To have it all together. Others expect me to be perfect and happy (or at least I feel like they do). And social media? They definitely expect you to be perfect. Perfectly edited cover photos on Facebook. Status updates about how your 2 day old baby rolled over, slept through the night, AND sang the alphabet. Perfectly executed Pinterest parties straight with photo booth and fourteen tiered rainbow cake that shoots fireworks.

These expectations are exhausting. And leave me questioning who I am and who I want to be. Always wondering if I'm doing enough, being enough, am enough. Something's got to give. I've got to figure something out.

So I am going to do just that. I am going to take the next six months to find some direction. To pinpoint my worth. Rediscover me. And hopefully be in a better place when my big birthday rolls around.

I hope you'll stick around for the journey. I have a feeling I am going to need all the support I can get.

Weekly Goals 10.14.13 - 10.20.13

Another week. Another opportunity to be awesome...or something like that.

Settling into this whole health kick has been challenging. Some days I feel like I totally got this. And some days I just don't care. Sometimes it takes so much more work to just be able to workout that I'm not sure it is worth it. The husband has to be on board with my schedule, the kiddies have to cooperate, the frickin stars have to aligned. Ugh. Whatever. I know how good I feel when I get up and moving. And I keep thinking back to the fact that I have let the whole internets know my goals already so I must follow through. Accountability. That's the name of the game.

I already rocked Monday by staying on track with my calories and burning a butt ton of calories at step. I am such a perfectionist and love being good at stuff, and I feel like a total rockstar in step class. I totally nailed those step combos last night and was pretty darn proud of myself. If that makes me a total dork, then so be it...I will totally own that. Check out that sweat glisten. Gross but good.

-Katherine

Five on Friday

Another Friday. Another five. Here Goes.

ONE
My CK asked to get her ears pierced this past weekend. Her bestie in pre-k has pierced ears and apparently peer pressure is a bitch when you're four years old. We've been trying to talk her out of it all week but she just wasn't having it. We even told her it would hurt a little but the threat of pain wasn't stopping her. So we had a mommy/daughter day yesterday and she now has holes in her ears. Holes that I get to clean 3 times a day. She loves them, though. And that's all that matters.

TWO

I've been seeing some spectacular sunrises here lately and I couldn't be more thankful for them. My mornings are early, hectic, and stressful. My alarm goes off at 5:20 and it is go go go for the rest of the day. By the time I get in the car to take CK to school, I've already been up and moving for two whole hours. I'm exhausted but these beautiful fall sunrises have reminded me to slow down and breath. I gather my thoughts and am thankful for the new day.

THREE
I've already ran twice this week. Woot woot! I've never been the running type so this is huge for me. I played competitive softball growing up and it was a joke when I got on base. Everyone said I ran like a penguin (waddled perhaps?) and I always had a sub-runner come in and take over for me. I'm pretty darn proud of myself for sticking with this even if it is only week two of training.

FOUR
Are you watching Sons of Anarchy?! Cause you totally should. Marcus and I jumped on the Samcro bandwagon right before season 2 started and have been obsessed ever since. It helps that Jax Teller (the main character) is smokin' hot and such a badass. Who doesn't want a bad boy? In last week's episode he was shirtless and heating up a baby bottle. It was awesome.

FIVE
I love these two.

Happy Weekend!
-Katherine

Burn Baby Burn

Here lately I've been trying to get my stuff together to be healthier. It's really hard. Truth be told, I would love to sit around and watch Netflix all day long while stuffing my face with oatmeal creme pies and guzzling cherry coke. (Attractive, right?) But I realize this is probably not the best idea if I want to continue to fit into the already sparse wardrobe of mine and be there to watch my kiddies graduate high school.

So, I'm trying my damndest (that's totally a word, right?) to make better decisions about food and get this big booty moving a couple of times a week. Yesterday I did really well and felt like a total ninja warrior princess. I kept my calories under control and burn a butt ton of them off at step class. I used to take step class in college and I absolutely loved it, so it was awesome to get back at it last night. Of course there are times when I feel like a complete idiot who is about to fall flat on my face, but I just keep checking my watch and push through when I see those calories a-burnin.

Not THAT'S motivation!

-Katherine

Weekly Goals 10.6.13 - 10.13.13

Monday...we meet again. I'm determined to make this a good week so here we go!

A little weekend recap for ya...

Friday evening we explored the farm looking for good spots to take some fall family pictures. It was so much fun riding around with Marcus on the Kubota (we're Kountry with a capital K).I think we found some good spots so hopefully we can pull our stuff together and get out there sometime this week. The weather is looking absolutely perfect!

Saturday morning the kiddies woke up bright and early (Grrrrr). They spent their summers sleeping in until 9 or 9:30 so their new fall wake up time of 7:30 is killing me. CK spent the morning catching up on episodes of her beloved Scooby Doo (chica is obsessed!) and Hulk Logan was a wild man running all over the house and even learning how to "jump" (cutest thing ever). I cleaned out my craft armoire while dreaming of the day that I have the craft/sewing room of my dreams. My beautiful fabric stash deserves a proper display dangit.

Saturday afternoon we went to some friend's house to watch the Georgia/Tennessee game. Thank goodness Georgia won. I really could care less, but I find that my marriage suffers the week after a Georgia loss (sad but true).

Sunday morning the kiddies were back up bright and early, so I took the time to finish week 1 of 5k101. I was feeling pretty good the entire time and ended up averaging just under a 16 minute mile. I seem to hover at the 13 minute mile while I am actually "running" and slower during the walking intervals. Still slow as molasses, but not as bad as Thursday.

Sunday afternoon is typically date time with Marcus. We tried out a new-to-us restaurant in downtown Chattanooga and then hit up the movies. We saw Don Jon and it was...not what I expected. It wasn't bad. It wasn't great. It just kinda was. My favorite part of going to the movies is the candy (love me some Buncha Cruncha) and the previews anyways and both of those did not disappoint.

I'm looking forward to the week ahead. Hoping to be super duper productive early this week at work so I can take Thursday and Friday off. CK is on fall break and I would love to spend some time with her. Girlfran said she wants to get her ears pierced! Fingers crossed for a non-traumatic experience there. My extremely type A personality loves me some goals. How about this for accountability!?

Five on Friday

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Woohoo Friday! Today I'm link-up for the first time everrrrrrr! I've been following this link-up for a while now...great way to check out some new blogs and get to know some people. Here goes...

ONE
Scandal. Oh my word it is so good. I spent all of last week on a Netflix binge in preparation of the season premiere last night. I want to be Olivia Pope. I want to punch Mellie in the face. And I may want to do unmentionable things to Fitz in the Oval Office.

TWO
How cute is my CK sporting her school spirit this morning?! I whipped up that pocket tee last night along with what was supposed to be a cute little twirly skirt. It turned out to be a bit long and, according to her, her classmates told her she looked like an old lady. I noticed that she may have looked a bit geriatric this morning with the long skirt and tennis shoes, but I stayed up past my bedtime to finish that darn thing and by golly it was getting worn today.

THREE

I ran two whole times this week. That's a record. Write it down. I'm trying to get into this whole fitness thing so I am working my way through Running Mate 5K101. My lightning fast time below comes out to about a 17 minute mile. I seriously think paint dries faster than I run. But I'm out there doing it right? Right?!

FOUR
In my attempt to be more healthy, I've given up my beloved cherry cokes. Deep breaths. Deep breaths. I needed to find a replacement pronto so I've switched to unsweet tea with raspberry, extra lemons, and extra ice. It's no cherry coke but it IS pretty darn delicious. And you can't go wrong with Sonic ice.

FIVE
Hulk Logan. He makes my heart melt. I just can't get enough of him.

-Katherine

Here. Goes. Nothing.

I'm doing it. Stepping out of my comfort zone. Putting it all out there. Starting a blog.

I am a long-time blog lover. Blogs of all kinds. Craft blogs. Weight loss blogs. Mommy blogs. Blogs about faith. Blogs about celebrities and gossip. I just love taking a peak into the lives of other people and hearing their opinions. Perhaps I'm nosy. Perhaps I just like feeling connected to others. Whatever the reason, I'm going to give this blog thing a try and see how it works out. 

 

My first blogging goal is to just have fun. I hope this blog serves as a light and airy distraction to the everyday stress of light. A place people can come to put a smile on their face.

I am really hoping to use this blog to challenge myself. Challenge myself to step out of my comfort zone. Try new things. Meet new people. Learn as much as I can.

With that being said, I also need a place to hold myself accountable. I don't know how many times I have started something and not followed through. Crafting. Sewing. Working out. Being healthy. Not going to happen anymore. No sir-ree. I'm here to be the best me possible.

I also hope to make some new friends along the way. I feel like blogging is a great way to get to know someone as they share bits and pieces of their life. You feel connected to people with similar interests as you and can motivate one another. I am very much looking forward to it!

I hope you'll join me along this ride!

-Katherine